33.3 % done....Happy 6th Birthday Sawyer!

Today is June 13th, 2008, and Ben and I are 1/3rd of the way finished raising Sawyer.
How is this possible?
Can we start over?
Can we slow down?
Wait, I don't have enough film in my camera to capture every moment....!!!!

He is 6 years old today, and we have 12 years left before he is "legally" an adult! I only have 12 years left of influence under our roof, 12 years of our "rules", daily routines, etc. Just 12 short years of getting to check in on him in the middle of the night...to sneak in and kiss his sweet forehead and tell him that he is one of my greatest blessings. How is this possible? Have I taken the last 6 years for granted as they have flown by?


We've definitely tried the "trial/error/ask a lot of advice/read a lot of books/ask for God's mercy,grace,and forgiveness" method of parenting, but if who Sawyer is at 6 is any indication of how well we've done so far--we are amazing parents (ha ha ha, Yes, God, I know that all of this is because of who YOU are and what You've done through us and others in his life----thanks a million! You are awesome! Keep it coming!).

6 years ago today my life was changed forever. I became a mommy and Ben and I became a family, and my heart has never been the same since. I have learned more about who God is, His love for us, the sacrifice He made, the joy He takes in us, the desires and hope He has for us, because of my love for Sawyer.

Sawyer is kind and sensitive, funny and outgoing, creative and intelligent, and extremely handsome (what can I say, he takes after me----------oh man, now that is good for a laugh out loud!) Others enjoy being around him and unfortunately, the ladies already love him (his friend Audrey told her mom, "I really like Sawyer" Her mom tried to downplay it and say "yes, Sawyer is a nice friend" and Audrey said wistfully, "I think it's his golden hair, (sigh)" (maybe he takes after Ben in this department after all!!!)

I am so thankful for the last 6 years, and look forward to what the next 12 years will bring. Sawyer, you make me so proud and as I tell you every night "I can't wait to see what God has planned for you----I know it's something amazing!" I'm just glad I get a front row seat!!!

People Pleaser. . .TAG

I don't usually do things like this, BUT. . . to satisfy my inner need to never disappoint someone I love, here you go Kipplyn!

The inquisition...
1. The rules of the game get posted at the beginning.
2. Each player answers the questions about themselves.
3. At the end of the post, the player tags 5-6 people, posts their names, then leaves a comment in their respective blogs to let them know they've been tagged.
4. Let the person who tagged you know that you posted your answers.


Questions...
1. What were you doing 10 years ago?
10 years ago…that makes me laugh! That puts us at June 9, 1998. I was a 19 year old girl who had no idea what the next 10 years would bring! I had just completed my freshman year at U of A and my biggest stress in life was deciding what outfit to wear on the weekends!!! It was about this time 10 years ago that I met Ben Shankle, a cute, but overly conceited, I mean, overly confident guy who had just returned to Fayetteville from the U.S. Naval Academy Prep School. He loved me from the first time he laid eyes on me (ha ha ha, I’m sure “love” is the right verb to use here instead of “infatuated with, “had the hots for”, etc, etc.). The first night we met I noticed he kept checking me out and I “busted him out” (his words) by calling him out on it. I said “Why do you keep looking at me?” and he hem hawed around till he came up with “uh, you, uh, just look like someone I know, and I, um, you know, I’m just trying to figure out who it is”. I guess the “someone I looked like” was his future wife!!!

2. What are 5 things on your to-do list today?
1. go to the gym to start week 6 of body for life---shhhh, don’t tell anyone, I don’t want any accountability :)
2. take the kids to Rick’s Bakery to order Sawyer’s star wars birthday cake
3. laundry
4. laundry (don’t be jealous of my glamorous life!!!!)
5. swimming at Grammy’s (if this rain stops, if not, more laundry)


3. What are some snacks you enjoy?
Did you see the aforementioned body for life entry??? I don’t think it is a good idea for me to daydream about my beloved snacks (chocolate, chocolate, chocolate, chocolate, COKE COKE COKE COKE), instead let’s talk about how great protein is…yummy!!! Can I have some more chicken please?

4. What would you do if you were a billionaire?
Billionaire???? I can’t even fathom how much money that is. Okay on a deep meaningful level, I would build orphanages, hospitals, schools, sponsor missionaries, as well as go on mission trips to Africa and Romanian Orphanages, travel the world with my family so that my children see what the world looks like (the good, bad, and ugly) and show them how we can serve others. On a not so deep level, buy really fun gifts for my parents, in-laws, grandparents, etc. (oh, and probably a boob job).

5. What are 3 of your bad habits?
3 bad habits---that’s a hard one (wink wink). Letting my emotions control me, telling Ben how to drive (however, I find this to be very helpful, probably, even at times, lifesaving), and talking too much. Oh, and I seem to have a total disregard for correct grammar and punctuation at this point in my life (I love parentheses, commas, and . . .’s ) they accentuate the areas in my conversational writing style where my sarcasm and wit come in, plus I’m not getting graded (naaana naaana booo booo). Oh, and leaving all the lights on, sorry Ben! And I have a messy car. And I don’t write thank you notes (actually, I write them and then don’t send them because I don’t have any stamps, because this is 2008 and we do EVERYTHING online so why can’t we just send thank you emails????) Anyway, oh yeah, I was only supposed to write 3 (did mention I talk too much?)


6. What are 5 places you have lived?
1. Siloam Springs “where Jesus is Lord” ---we really do have a billboard that says that when you pull into town! I love it! What a great place to be raised!!!
2. Fayetteville (where Jesus is still Lord but they definitely don’t have a billboard that says so!!!)
3. ABQ, NM (the land of entrapment…I mean “enchantment” yeah, that’s it!)
4. WalMart, AR (aka Bentonville)
5. Cave Springs


7. What are 5 jobs you've had?
1. lifeguard
2. Hostess at Bennigan’s
3. Junior Lobo Club Director
4. Marketing and Communications Coordinator (Enhanced Communications Group)
5. “Just a Mom” I love that phrase…. “what do you do?” “oh, I’m just a mom” There’s nothing else I’d rather “just” be!

8. What is currently playing on your IPOD?
I don’t really know where my IPOD is! I usually just download free sermons from Mosaic church in California (Erwin McManus). Don’t get me wrong you’ll still find a strange mixture of Jars of Clay, Britney Spears (shhhh, don’t tell), Tupac, and George Straight.

9. What are the last 5-6 books you've read?
The Shack
Love and Respect
The Cry of My Soul
(I just got 2 new books at Church last week, Living Proof, and TrueFaced)
Oh yeah, and Goodnight Moon, and Gid the Kid--The Tale of the Black Bean Bandits

10. Who do you want to tag?
Becca
Jonna
Shannon

She wore an itsybitsyteenyweenyyellowpolkadot tankini? turtleneck?Muumuu?

Swimsuit season, blah. It can bring out the worst in everyone. Let me tell you, I now know from experience that pride comes before the fall. And by fall, I mean boobies (if mine could talk they would scream "Help, we've fallen and can't get up!"). In fact, nothing seems to be quite were I left it at 21 years of age. No, someone has come in and rearranged all the furniture (actually, there are 3 someone's who have stretched it out over a 6 year period). What used to look like the custom designer showcase gallery now resembles a used set from Furniture Factory Outlet. Thus the reason for the cranky mood this weekend. I heard a rumor that there were a ton of cute swimsuits at Dillard's, and yes they did look really "cute" on the hanger, but not so cute off the hanger and on the bod, and there was nothing cute about the $100+ price tag. So I left Dillard's slightly more than a little disgruntled and headed to Target.

Target had a good selection of mix and match pieces so I grabbed a few and headed towards the dressing room. When I got there the fabulously unenthusiastic dressing room attendant barely looked up from her pile of unfolded clothes and yawned "How many?" I counted the tops and bottoms and skirts and coverups and told her I had nine. "Limit's 6," she said as she rolled her eyes at me.

Look, I'm all for rules....remember in my earlier post when I so graciously explained to my son about rules and authority and all that stuff??? But there is a time and a place for bending (not breaking) rules. ---More of a flexible discretion of enforcement of said policy, and I believe this was one of those times. I tried to win her over with an "oh, come on, I really don't want to try these on and then walk back out here half naked to get the rest". Surely she would get it. It's a universal female code that no one wants to prance through the dressing room area, fluorescent lights blaring, with a swimsuit that doesn't fit and has your granny panties sticking out 2 inches from every angle. Apparently she was new to this planet and hadn't learned the code.

"Limit's 6".

This is the point of the story that I want to tell you how a spirit-filled, virtuous woman responds in a situation like this (when I get an email back from Beth Moore, I'll let you know). Until then, I'll tell you what I said.

I began looking through my pile, trying to decipher which 6 to try on first, while I glanced sarcastically back at the attendant and said "Well, let me see here, I'm trying to decide which ones I want to shove in my purse the most!"

Swimsuit season....I told you it brings out the worst.

:)

What "they" (you know the experts who know it all) don't tell you about having babies is that while you are pushing out those precious bundles of joy, 30-75% of your brain cells simultaneously come flying out as well....and just like the baby, they can't put it back in! I often tell people (or mostly to reassure myself) "I used to be really smart" (and yes, mom, I know that this is all due to the fact that you read to us EVERY night before bed ----hey did that recognition qualify as a sweet mother's day gift to you or should I still buy you something???) Anyway,
so, yes, I used to be smart, bright, intelligent, well-read, witty, blah blah blah (see, lack of brain cells) and could always whip out an A+ essay with little to no effort. This little talent of mine was put to the test today as I attempted to fill our Sawyer's kindergarten application form for a "Classical Christian" school. The form is 10 pages long and combines the standard name, address, phone number questions (I did pretty good on those!) to more thought provoking questions such as, "What, in your understanding, makes a Christian school distinctively "Christian"? and "Define in your own words what you believe is a "Classical Education" and the benefits thereof." Remember, this is ten pages long!

So I began my quest to appear as spiritually and academically wise as possible, throwing around phrases like "biblical worldview", "post modernism" "creative, yet structured learning environment" "trivium" "commitment to academic excellence" "in accordance to and founded upon" blah blah blah. So far, so good! Up until this point I'm seeing flashes of my old self, (okay, not flashes, more like a slow fluorescent bulb warming up, but hey!). And then I get to this question "How would you characterize your student's academic ability and level of interest?" Did I mention that Sawyer is 5 and this is a kindergarten application???

So I wrote..."Sawyer has developed an amazing mastery of the English alphabet and numeric system. He has been proficient in cutting and pasting and has never eaten glue".

Okay, I refrained, but by this time I had to have a little comic relief so I wrote "I would say that Sawyer is a quick learner (oh yeah, and a genius---doesn't every parent say that?)" and then to accent my cute little parenthetical side note .....drum roll please.....i drew a smiley face!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH after all the arduous work, the deliberately chosen words, the eloquent phrases, the carefully placed scripture references, I ended it all with a smiley face!

I'll let you know if he gets accepted :) or not :(


I guess I chalk this up to the fact that my name is Stacy....and that people with names like "Stacy" are allowed to draw cute smiley faces and hearts on things if we want. Sorry to all of you Katherine's and Elizabeth's that don't have that freedom!

It was supposed to be a parable.....

Act 1 Scene 1
Setting: On the way to preschool
Time: late (as usual)

Mommy: You've had so many good teachers at your school, haven't you Sawyer?

Sawyer: Yes, I've even had 2 different ones this year.

Mommy: Do you remember your very first teacher's name?

Sawyer: Yes, it was Mrs. Ostrand. She is sooooooooo nice, except do you remember that time she was mean to me at nap time? I wouldn't be quiet, so she talked mean to me.

ENTER: HEAVENLY ANGELS TO PLACE A HALO OVER MOMMY'S HEAD AS SHE BEGINS TO USE THIS MOMENT TO CONDUCT SPIRITUAL TRAINING

Mommy: Sawyer, she wasn't being "mean" to you. She was disciplining you and correcting you. When people are in authority over us, it is their job to enforce the rules. It may feel mean but it is not, it's actual good for us because it helps us obey. Just like if mommy was speeding down the road and a policeman pulled me over. He wouldn't be "being mean", he would be doing his job to enforce the law.

Act 1 Scene 2
Setting: still in the minivan, pulled over in a McDonald's parking lot, blue lights flashing
Time: 5 minutes later

Officer: Do you know why I pulled you over ma'am?

Mommy: Yes, because God always seems to use this comic irony in my life for his divine amusement :) (it was suppposed to be a parable Lord!!!!!)

Where is the pause button????

You know those moments in life that you just want to capture---to permanently freeze so that you don't just "remember" it, but that you actually FEEL it all over again? I think I have those moments a lot...and might not even notice.

In this hurried hurried world, I definitely need a pause button. Just a few minutes to sit back and think about what these moments mean---to look at it from a few different angles and put it in perspective, learn a lesson, better myself, and more importantly to remember to be so thankful. I had a lot of those today. Just sweet little reminders that my kids are my greatest blessings, that my husband makes me proud, that whether we are all wrestling on the floor of our new house or on the floor of an old trailer it still would have been just as great, that I have a God who loves me and that wants me to love Him more. Can I share a few of those moments with you?
Walker, Sawyer, and even Sunny were "playing" instruments for me on the floor. Sawyer was jamming out on the guitar, and Sunny and Walker were banging on the drums...Sawyer says "hit it walker, sing the song you wrote" and Walker yells out "when you are bad NANANANANANANANANANANANA you don't get to go to the doughnut shop........when you are sad you go to the doughnut shop and it makes you glad NANANANANANANANA"

PAUSE.....three sweet babies laughing, singing, playing together, bringing so much joy to their mommy (by the way, how is it that Walker, at age 3, has already picked up on the glory that is Krispy Kreme?)

I'll limit it to one more PAUSEable moment. Tonight as the boys were going to sleep I read a Bible story that talked about God answering prayers. I told the boys "God will always hear your prayers", and Sawyer said "mom, on the movie that we just watched it said that God will always answer your prayers, but that it isn't always right away and sometimes he says no, sometimes yes and sometimes he says wait" PAUSE. . .whether or not my sweet 5 year old little boy can fully understand this statement or not doesn't matter....the fact that his little brain heard that statement and held on to it does matter! Then Sawyer said "sometimes I don't know if I can hear God" and Walker said "That's because you have to be quiet because He whispers."

Where is that pause button??

simple prayers

It turns out that I am not a very good blogger. I don't have the time or energy or at this point in my life the brain cells required to construct a complex sentence. I did want to share something that I've been nibbling on for a while. When Sawyer or Walker pray they always start it out the same way "Dear God, Thank You for this great day"....they usually continue on with things like "thank you for mommy and daddy and my brother and sister, and thank you that we got to play outside today and thank you that we got to watch ninja warriors on tv and thank you that when we were at WalMart we got to each get one cookie, but then the lady said we could each have 2 so we got 2 cookies...etc, etc..." (they don't actually say the "etc, etc" but sometimes we might get to eat dinner a little quicker if they did!)
Anyway, the part that I love is "thank you for this great day". I don't know if we taught them that, if they came up with it, if they say it out of habit or if they really mean it. All I know is that they say it every time, and I want to too. I want to say (and mean) "Thank You God for this great day". They never say "thank you for this great day, except for that part when I fell down and got a booboo" or "thanks for this great day, except for when mommy yelled at everybody in the car for taking the lids off our drinks and spilling chocolate milk all over".

Just "thanks for this great day".

A dear friend of my sister-in-law had a baby 7 days ago that wasn't supposed to live for 7 minutes. She has lived for a week now. I can't even pretend to know what it's been like, not even for a moment. The only thing I do know is how it feels to love your child. How hard yet how GREAT have the 7 days been? Thank you, God, for this GREAT day, and for the last 6.
Help me to mean it when I say it, even if circumstances aren't great, help me to see your Greatness in each day.